Thursday, June 4, 2009

google search: "my ass is turning the toilette seat pink?"

I'm not even joking.

So the other day, Mario points out that the normally white toilette seat is pink?? (We have one of those disgusting padded toilette seats that he refuses to let me replace. You know, the ones that let out all the extra air when you settle down onto it.)


I have no idea how it got this way. I wonder at first if I had worn any pink panties, shorts, etc. But quickly remember that when the toilette is used, one doesn't typically wear "bottoms". I am at a loss for a few days and Mario points out again, that the bed sheet has a pink tint to it as well.

Only on my side.

WTF? So, who do I turn to? Google of course. I honestly typed in, "my ass is turning my toilette seat pink?" I come across a wealth of information, mostly in "pregnancy" forums about other women who have experienced the same phenomenon. Most of the women are making fun of each other, but I start to see them talking about the correlation between their pregnancy and the pink toilette seat syndrome. It turns out that the only women with this problem are pregnant!! Don't get all excited, I am so not pregnant, but what do most pregnant women do?? They take pre-natals. Turns out that the vitamins do something to my hormones which makes my body leak pink. I guess this is the first "odd" thing in a long string of events that I will experience during my soon-to-be pregnancy.

This reminds me of a time when Mario and I had first started spending the night together - I kept waking up with a black tongue! WTF? Apparently Google and I did not have such a great relationship back then, because I just worried for a few weeks that I had some terribly embarrassing disease. Soon enough, Mario comes to me complaining that his tongue has been black in the mornings.


Somehow, we come to the conclusion that the chewable pepto bismol we had been taking was the most possible culprit and decided to do a little experiment. I took some, he did not - long story short, we were right. Apparently you can't take chewable pepto at night before bed without waking up with the mysterious "black tounge". (I'm also not quite sure why we had been taking so much pepto...)

I should also add that a few women changed their seats blueish purple - and they ended up having boys - looks like I am still on the right track for that girl. All signs point to yes!

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