we have moved!!

I have moved the blog to www.vincenzojames.blogspot.com. Please visit often!

Day 7 (April 24, 2010)

oh dear god I love this child.

no more chord stump. just a perfect little belly button.

He has arrived

I still cannot find the words to describe what I'm feeling. So I am leaving you with just pictures. The amount of love that I am feeling for this little family of mine is overwhelmingly amazing.

pure bliss.

I promise to write more soon, right now, I just want to stare at my baby.

Momma P.

f.u.c.k.

Oh... So this is what a contraction feels like.

f.u.c.k.

Its not even worth saying "I'm so glad I didn't do this all natural" because it NEVER would have happened.

I think I am something like a 3 and it hurts like a mother. Guess the gels are working.

When do we start talking epidural?

Does anyone have the same problem I have. That one thing you know you shouldn't eat, but can't stop dipping your finger in? So much that you actually have to fill the bowl with water to ruin the chance of possibly getting anymore? So much, that after you actually cook it, you can't imagine eating any of them without vomiting?

brownie mix. I think I actually make it just to eat the dough.

For some reason, this kid just. loves. chocolate. I went to the store today to get milk and came home with chocolate brownie mix, chocolate soy milk and chocolate ice cream. Seriously, this is getting bad. No wonder he doesn't want to come out... he won't get these delicious foods on the outside. I think they will be my last junk food purchases for a while.

As many of you already know, we are STILL WAITING!! This little guy is taking his sweet time. I don't like to think he is overdue... I think it is more of a mistake on our part... we were just early. I will be induced on Friday if he is not here yet, and it is looking more and more like a reality at this point. I am not excited about that, but at least I know that I will be looking into his big eyes at some point this weekend.

Can you believe it! Can't wait to meet him.

P

here I sit, upon my ball...

It is 8:06 am and I have already downed 2 cookies. Yum.

I woke up way too early this morning. 6 am. Who gets up at 6 am? I had been in and out of sleep since nearly 1 am due to some and cramping, which I hoped, knowing it was false, would last through the morning and turn into something more like, I don't know, maybe actual labor!! I got up with my lovely husband, who does actually have to get up before 6 am every morning for work, to see if they would subside or continue to get stronger.

Of course they went away. And now my hair is too wet to go back to bed. I will surely need a nap later.

I had a little talk with Vincenzo while in the shower this morning. We will have to see if it has done any good.

I have been hanging out on my exercise ball all morning, trying to get some emails out. Trying to pass the time. Rolling back and forth. I read that it can help labor progress in the early stages. Let's hope so. As of now, all it has managed to do is make my lady parts numb and incredibly heavy when I stand up. I am sure you all wanted to know that.

I have a feeling I will probably be going to my Dr. appointment on Monday, even though I swore I would have my baby before then. Let's hope not.

Here's to hoping that my next post is about being in labor!!

P

oh the waiting....

So I have created these elaborate lists of things to do, in order to keep myself busy during this excruciating period of waiting. One thing on my list... thank you cards. I am ever so grateful for all of the wonderful baby gifts that have been pouring in, ever so grateful. However, I am not a big fan of thank you cards. I would rather call someone to thank them, or thank them in person when I open their gift. It just seems like such a stale formality. Almost so expected that it becomes meaningless.

And although I am someone who would not know the difference between someone sending me one or not, I know that there are also people out there who may be offended if they do not receive one.

I considered calling some people and sending emails to others (wherever appropriate). But I still feel like I am "supposed" to send an actual written card out. So, I have devised a plan... when I send out announcements, I will just drop in a thank you to those wonderful people who have given our little Vincenzo a gift. It will be perfect. My only concern is whether or not that is considered waiting to long. I hate all of the rules!

I guess I will just do what works for me. I am sure that people know how grateful we are for these wonderful gifts... it is amazing how much "stuff" you need with a new baby coming.

On another note.... when is this baby coming!!! I am waiting....

Christmas in April...

Today I received a very special package from my Aunt Julie and Uncle Bob in Texas. It is my little Vincenzo's very own Christmas stocking. It brought tears to my eyes. My Aunt Julie has made them for everyone for years... I still even have my own. I can't wait to hang it.

Thank you so much, we will cherish it forever!

...and here it is

The anxiousness has arrived. And it has brought boredom along with it. Not boredom because there is nothing to do... don't get me wrong, I could be vacuuming, cleaning, organizing, packing for the hospital, cleaning out my car, plucking my eyebrows, walking my dog, making a lasagna, an on and on. Boredom, because I am ready, again, for the next step and I am stuck waiting... again.

If you have read any of this blog.. you know I am no good at waiting.

Things I tend to do when I am bored...

lay on the couch and think about what I could eat.

eat.

think about some things I could be doing. but do nothing.

think about how I would like Vincenzo to be born, today. right now.

google labor signs. "How do I know when I am barely starting to go into labor?"

Sit in Vincenzo's room and daydream.

Write in my blog.

I am not sure I would want to be shooting at this point, but I certainly did not need to take a whole month off before the baby arrived like I had originally thought.. I am glad that those plans did not work out.

I wish Mario had spring break every week... then he could hang out with me. By the way, I am fully aware that those of you at work, especially my husband, would give anything to be "bored" at home and have no "9-5" job to go to every day. It doesn't make me any less bored.

Maybe if Micah was feeling better, I could hang with Tracey. Or... if I had some extra $, I could go shopping. Hmmm... that reminds me. I need to go get a nursing bra.

Check ya later! I found something fun to do.

P

12 days and counting....

This morning, I was thinking I should focus on trying to enjoy my last week or so of being pregnant, because even though I will be overwhelmed with joy when he is here, I am sure I will miss having the little guy inside of me. This option seems much better than just being anxious for him to "get out already!".

Turns out I am better at being anxious and impatient than just enjoying the moment.

It is now only noon and boy am I starting to feel some pressure. This must be what Tracey was talking about all those days we spent watching bad movies together before she gave birth to Micah. Not very enjoyable.

I still plan to try and hold back my impatient nature and appreciate the fact that I still have him all to myself. Twisting and turning inside of me.

Hopefully, when this is all over, I will remember the things I love about being pregnant, like feeling him move around inside of me; and my belly... yes, I love my pregnant belly. (not necessarily the fur it has decided to grow, which I assume will go away with the belly? Right?) I love daydreaming about what he will look like. And whenever I wonder why he is not moving around.. he gives a little kick to let me know he is still alive in there... getting ready to come out. It's like he knows what I am thinking.

Mario is getting very excited now too... I am loving it. I cannot wait to see him hold Vincenzo. It brings tears to my eyes just to think about it.

Our whole world is about to change. It could happen any day now.

Vincenzo's Room

Here it is! Vincenzo's nursery. We are just about finished. I am not quite done with the shelves.. just kind of threw things onto them for now. But it is pretty much finished! I am so happy with the way it turned out... even though I never had a "theme" like everyone kept asking about.

He will love it.

(I had trouble getting a pic of the "whole" room, but you can get the idea of it :)

Thank you to Mini and Louie for the crib... as soon as we fix the shelf, which could fall off of the wall at any moment, Vincenzo will rest safely inside it. Bridgette's mom also made Vincenzo the fabulous quilt hanging on the crib. THANK YOU! Handmade things are my favorite. He also has another quilt in the crib that Grandma Flo made for him. He is so luck to have so many people that love him.

My Ikea bouncy chair.. which I put together all on my own. My Grandma Flo made the blanked for me before we even made little Vincenzo.

Mario spent a lot of time putting together the dresser and bookshelf. Gotta love Ikea. And thank you to Tracey and Kathy for his name sign! It ended up working really well in the room.

The bottom picture on the wall in the above image is something we found that Mario drew in kindergarten and the other is from a painting that my niece Gabriela made for me. I will get right on filling those other frames. The yellow "may you always be happy" sign is my favorite. If only I could get it to stick to the wall!!

Thanks for coming over to help me put this all together yesterday Mini! Everything is perfect.

We are ready now Vincenzo... come whenever you are ready!

We are home!!!

Husband that loves me, makes me laugh every day and works hard to take care of our little family.... check

Job that I love and am grateful for every day... check

A beautiful house that we can finally call home... check

A baby to raise in that loving home... on his way!!!

Things are really happening. Our new house is coming together quite nicely. It already feels like home. It seemed so stressful getting here, but in the end, we ended up in the perfect place and we are very happy. very happy.

Vincenzo's room is almost done.. we just need to hang the decorations and do about a million loads of laundry! I will post pics as soon as we are finished.

I am now 37 weeks!! So close to delivery. I am hoping for Easter weekend, but I bet he makes me wait a little longer than that. I certainly don't feel like he is ready to join us just yet, but I have been informed that that means nothing.

Here is a shot of Mario and I in front of the house on move in day. I can't wait to frame it. Such a wonderful time in our lives :)

maternity picture

Here are a few maternity pictures from my shoot with Bridgette. I LOVE them.

Thank you Bridgette! I love the way they turned out.

dixie cups

I woke up quite early this morning, well, not early for some of you, but early for me. (Andrea reminded me not to complain just yet, as she had been up since 4am.. and was at work. I seem to lead quite the glorious life.

Anywho... I was seeing some flashing lights and could not seem to focus on my computer screen, and the Dr. suggested I come in for some tests. Once of which was peeing in a cup... a dixie cup. I am not sure if I have mentioned this before, but my very strange Dr.'s office has their patients pee into tiny dixie cups. This may not seem so bad, until you get into the bathroom where the light is so dim, you can't see your hand when you are trying to pee into this tiny opening. Of course you get pee on the cup and your hands and then they want you to bring it out to them. So I try my best to clean off the cup and add a few more underneath it, you know, for padding. Then I always start to wonder if I was actually supposed to pee into the dixie cups. I look around for some plastic version of the the urine cup and find nothing. I wonder if everyone feels strange about this?

Tests were all clear. Nothing to worry about... and they always say, "if it happens again this weekend, we want you to go straight to the hospital," which makes me quite nervous. Do I really need to go to the emergency room if I see more flashing lights, even though it meant nothing this time?

Little Vincenzo is apparently in the perfect position and his heartbeat sounds great. This makes me feel good.

We should be moving next week... and I will certainly post some nursery pictures when it is all ready! I can't wait.

Have a wonderful weekend!

P

Shower Pics

Here are a few pics from the shower!

THANK YOU to Bridgette for taking the photos!

And to everyone who traveled from out of town to attend.

Not sure why we look soooo white in this photo... I may have washed it out a bit...

I can't wait to read all of the stars.

So many cute onesies!

Vincenzo will LOVE all of his books!

I assume this one was for Mario.. he loved it.

Lyla enjoying a deliciously sweet cookie.

Thank you to everyone for coming!

I had a fabulous time and am so grateful for all of the wonderful gifts.

loving my baby

I am really just bored and don't have much to say. Last night I wanted to post something about how in love I am with my little man. I truly am.

I was talking to Mario about how we are so anxious to get into this house.. so anxious for so many things. And in just a few short weeks, we will be these sleep deprived versions of ourselves, taking care of our child. our child. In our new home, a little family . It blows my mind. But it is helpful for me to know that, because it reminds me that things will come in good time. And if the house takes a few extra days, so be it.

That being said. I hope we get the keys this Friday!! (I have been told it may be early next week, but I am still keeping my hopes up!) Please keep your hopes up with me.

I hope that everyone has a wonderful day... I can't wait for my milkshake and fries lunch with Kristine and sweet Patty. Yum.

35 weeks!!

More bathroom mirror belly shots.

blogging is NOT on my list of things to do.....

I have recently developed a bad habit of buying new baby things online. It is bad. But how can I resist??

Poster for my little man's room - I will need to buy a frame :)

not really sure why I bought these... love the mushroom though. Rattles and teething toys.

interesting mobile. I hope I like it when it arrives :)

Oh... there is more. and possibly more to come...

Now that we are this much closer to actually buying a house I am getting more and more excited about decorating Vincenzo's room. I can't wait to get in there and set things up!!

I am hoping to be able to post some maternity photos soon.. I will let you know when I get them.

Have a wonderful day!

P

Oye vey....

So.. as I pop tiny chocolate egg after tiny chocolate egg into mouth... knowing that it will make me fill ill very soon, I am online researching diapers. Oye vey.

I had made a decision to use seventh generation diapers and decided I wanted to know why chlorine free diapers were the better choice. Not an easy find.

Most of what I find is environmental, and don't get me wrong, I do care about the environment, but that is not my reason for using them. What I am worried about is my little one and what I am putting on him day in and day out. The diapers will sit in a landfill for years to come no matter which disposable I choose.

The chlorine problem stems from the Dioxin, which is a byproduct of the paper-bleaching process used in manufacturing disposable diapers. It has also been shown to cause cancer, birth defects, liver damage, and skin diseases. Chlorine-free disposable diapers, therefore, do not pose the same risk. I can't find evidence that this is a problem when touching babies skin or just during the manufacturing process??

I did come across the SAP "gel" issue. Apparently diapers use a gel, three layers into the diaper, to absorb the moisture. This gel is made of sodium polyacrylate which has been known to cause toxic shock syndrome and has been removed from tampons, but not diapers.

Also, TBT, or tributyl tin, is an environmental pollutant, believed to be one of the most toxic substances ever made, has a hormone-like effect; even small amounts can impair immune and hormonal systems. So I guess we don't want that....

Where does this leave me? Well.. I have found that seventh generation diapers use the SAP gel, and that they are not brown because they are "not bleached", but because they are died brown! Their website actually states that they die them brown to distinguish them from other diapers on the market. So what is the point of spending the extra money on them?

There are a couple diapers that are free of everything that could be unsafe, but there is no way I can afford them. Especially because they are so much more expensive and they all say you have to change them more often because they are not as absorbent.

I have decided to buy traditional diapers. Enough is enough. I can't afford the alternative and cloth diapers are not an option.

Vincenzo will thank me when I can afford to feed and shelter him.

Just a side note... I in no way intended to "inform" anyone about these issues... it is simply helpful for me to "write" things out in order to make these ridiculous decisions. It's just how I roll.

don't tell my husband.....

But I just bought these absolutely delicious baby legs for my little guy. I keep seeing them around, but they seem so girly and I thought Mario would kill me if I tried to dress our sweet boy in tights. We will see if he even wears them... it will be close to 100 degrees pretty quickly after he is born. We'll just have to keep the house really cold. I couldn't find a good picture of a boy wearing them, but we will get one when he arrives!

now... what else can I do to avoid cleaning my house....

Somehow, as I lay wide awake in bed this morning at 4:30, I convinced myself that I had gotten at least 8 hours of sleep, so I may as well get up. Turns out my early morning math is exactly accurate. Seeing as I feel asleep at maybe 10:00 pm ... I got about 6 hours. Not enough.

None the less, I am awake, watching the traffic reports... every five minutes. Be careful on that 101, and if you leave before 6:30 am, you will shave a whole 5 minutes off of your drive.

My little man is certainly getting bigger in there. Moving around in some not so comfortable ways. Always a lovely feeling though.

I have decided that it is not such a good idea for me to watch TV dramas about sick and dyeing babies. First of all, there is no way the woman from Private Practice last night was just 25 weeks. She had a huge belly and suddenly gives birth to a 2 pound baby... come on. TV and movies are turning out to be less and less like real life than I had hoped. Although... I guess that also means my babies birth is less likely to be like that of a patient on an episode on Grey's Anatomy, which is encouraging.

I officially do not have gestational diabetes, although I was told that I do need to watch my sugar intake. I guess that means no more baked goods... no more daily ice cream cones. I will miss them. The problem is that telling me to cut back actually makes me think about it more. I need a number. Give me some sort of a limit per day and I think I would have a much easier time. It's like being on a diet... I tend to gain weight, not lose it. There is something greater in the mix now though, so maybe I will find it easier.

Well, now I am just writing out of boredom.... maybe I will go back to sleep.

Have a fabulous weekend!

P

pissed...

I am so pissed. beyond pissed. I had a Dr. appointment today and the first thing the nurse asks me is, "did you get your 3 hour glucose screening done?" To which I of course say no, seeing as I was told that someone would call me if the levels from the first test were high - and no one called me. I was told that "no news was good news". Apparently no news means no one took the time to call me!!

So now, I have gone a month without knowing that my glucose levels were high enough for them to want me to get the additional 3 hour test done - all while eating whatever I feel like and not really concentrating on a healthy diet at all.

Basically, I could have it and have not properly cared for myself and my baby for over a month. I am so pissed.

Tomorrow, bright and early, I will go get the 3 hour test done and hope to god that they results come back saying I do not have gestational diabetes.

I know that the list of things that could go wrong include some extremes, but even if I do not end up having it, why the F&%$ couldn't someone get it together enough to call me. Maybe I am crazy, but I think that is kind of a big deal.

Pissed.

P

chocolate

It is 9am and I am already thinking about chocolate. Longing for it. I made these cupcakes that I know will give me pretty severe indigestion for the remainder of the day, but I can't help myself.

I am having one.

We'll worry about the consequences later.

oh how it aches...

I think little Vinny has found a comfortable sleeping spot deep in the back curve of my rib cage.

At first, I though it was my pillow situation.. I tried to change things and nothing worked. Yesterday, I purchased a fluffy mattress pad to make my mattress a bit more comfy... and I get the same pain this morning. (not to mention, Mario was so comfortable on this new wonder pad that he snored more than EVER!)

He must be hanging out in my rib cage while I am sleeping. That's not to say there is not some appendage playing footsie with my bladder all night as well.

I guess I just have to accept that it is now part of my life.. and it will soon pass when he decides to come out and join us. I can handle that.

Did I mention that my face is getting fatter? Seriously. I looked in the mirror yesterday, only to find that my face was looking rounder. Shit. I am getting fat. Better make some brownies, quick!

I am 31 weeks now. Can you believe it!! I certainly can't. I think about the birth now, and it makes me a little emotional. I am a little scared, but I know that Mario will be there to support and laugh with me. He always makes me laugh. And often, when I am imagining what it will be like, I see us laughing with each other, even though the pain and nastiness of it all. I can't wait to see what he will be like as a father.

P

growing belly

my belly seems much larger today. my little man is getting bigger. he has also been kicking around in some not so comfortable ways.

let's just say, that magical phase of laying on the couch just waiting for that one little flutter is long gone.

we are in the big leagues now. the "I need to sleep with over 40 pillows to stay comfortable at night" phase has now set in. this is no fun, seeing as I have to flip sides like 100 times before I actually fall asleep, taking my entire entourage of pillows with me each time.

and the indigestion. oh the indigestion. it is certainly not my friend. but the clerk at the circle k could tell exactly why I came into his store in a panic to find some tums, and that made me happy.

I can't believe we are getting this close! I am in my 30th week now. 30 weeks!!! I can remember being bummed out because my first pregnancy test came back negative. and now look where I am. it really is amazing.

now, if we could only get into this house fast enough for me to make a home for him.....

please keep Mario's father in your thoughts tomorrow as he will be going in for heart surgery early in the morning.

p

making out with Tina Fey

so in the wee hours of the morning... in a very peculiar dream, where I was attempting to get out of a ticket, in order to avoid jail time, I ran into Tina Fey, working as a court clerk. She took a liking to me, was planning to drop my case, and after a long period talking to me, so close to my face, I could feel her nose bumping mine, and me wondering if she might be on crack, she tried to make out with me.

ahhhh... pregnancy dreams.

the great mattress dilemma...

My mother has decided that I am crazy.... and maybe I am, but only a little.

So at first, I knew I wanted an organic mattress... turns out organic is not always much better than your typical mattress, (in this great mattress debate anyway...) And I soon came up with this theory that getting a used mattress was safer than a new mattress because the toxic gasses (which have been shown to cause SIDS) have already released. (I should add here that I cannot remember where I got this information, but passed it around as if it had been researched meticulously.)

Turns out... a used mattress is much more likely to cause my sweet child harm than a new one! Somehow the gasses have already released, so the fungus is quicker to release them with a new occupant. Awesome.

So then I was stuck, again, on buying a new, organic, mattress. They really real you in out there... some sites even told my my baby would be more likely to DIE if I did not think of his well being and make the right decision in purchasing the right organic mattress. Seriously.. it is scary out there for someone as gullible as I am.

Is my baby even going to sleep in his crib?

Anywho... through all of this research, trying to find credible sources, I came across Babesafe mattress wrapping. It totally makes sense and has research and years of success to back it up. Basically, you buy this $30 plastic cover made from certain materials and wrap the mattress in it. Then, you just put a special blanket or 100% cotton towel over the top of it, top it off with a 100% cotton crib sheet, and wala! Your baby will live for years to come.

They have been studying it in New Zealand for over 10 years and since the beginning of the campaign, not 1 baby has died from SIDS when using a properly wrapped mattress. (I want to say the number is up around 200,000 babies.)

I am buying one for his crib mattress and his co-sleeper. I feel better now that this great mattress debate is over.

If you are interested... you can check it out at: http://www.babesafe.com

Just to add... I am sure we all grew up on these terribly unsafe mattresses and we all seem to be doing just fine.

sleep

I actually had this thought the other night while getting up for the umpteenth time to pee...

"When I have this baby I will finally get to sleep through the night without having to get up to pee every second!"

Hilarious.

another way to avoid actual work...

I have spent the last hour researching diaper ointment and baby lotion on skindeep.com. Sometimes I wish I was oblivious to all of the information that was out there. Everything readily available and affordable seems to cause things like:

neurotoxicity

Cancer Developmental/reproductive toxicity Developmental/reproductive toxicity
Other concerns for ingredients used in this product: Neurotoxicity, Endocrine, disruption, Persistence and bioaccumulation, Organ system toxicity (non-reproductive),Miscellaneous, Irritation (skin, eyes, or lungs), Contamination concerns, Occupational hazards, Biochemical or cellular level changes Awesome. Things are rated from 1-10. 10 must just guaruntee that my poor child will someday die from cancer. Don't even get me started on diapers. That is a whole other day of avoiding work. We all grew up on this stuff, right? And we are all still living. Maybe we all have cancer, who knows. I read something somewhere about the fact that everyone we know will someday die from a cancer related illness. scary. grrrrrrrrr. going back to oblivion. or maybe work. we'll see. p p.s. I am not sure whats up with the formatting of this post.... can't seem to fix it.

another way to avoid actual work...

belly shots

So I am officially not very good at the whole "self belly portrait" stuff. Maybe I need to invest in a tri-pod... or teach Mario to shoot my belly :) This shot was taken in my bathroom mirror... and although I did not "change" anything in photoshop, I did have to remove a crumb on my chest from my lunch... I never looked at my appendectomy scar like this either... maybe I should have taken it from the other side.....

people are starting to notice!

People are starting to notice that I am pregnant... I love it. It is hard to imagine that in just 3 short months, we will have a baby boy!!! (tears...)

wow.

cravings...

Most pregnant women probably have their very own cravings. I, on the other hand, seem to just copy Tracey's cravings. Tracey loved soda while she was pregnant, I too love soda. Even though I wouldn't come near it before I became pregnant. Tracey loved to bake. I can't stop baking. Again, even though I would never even consider it before I was pregnant.

All she has to do is tell me about something she wanted while pregnant and suddenly, I need it.

By the way.... my "no more baking sweets after the new year" rule has already been broken. I made some yummy carrot cake muffins. Delish.

My little Vincenzo (Vin-chen-zo) has been kicking up a storm lately... I wonder what he is up to in there.

Happy New Year! I am sure this will be one of many wonderful surprises.